When “Meh” Is the Mood: Reflections from the Therapy Room on Midlife Overwhelm

This week in clinical practice, a familiar theme echoed through many of my sessions: women in midlife, sitting across from me with a quiet sigh, saying something like:

> “I’m not falling apart… I’m just tired. Everything feels like too much, and at the same time, nothing feels particularly wrong. I’m just… meh.”

It’s a word that comes up often—meh. Not full-blown burnout, not acute crisis. Just a persistent sense of overwhelm, numbness, or disconnection that creeps in when life becomes too full for too long.

Midlife carries an invisible weight. For many women, this is a season of managing the needs of nearly everyone but themselves. There are aging parents to care for, teens who need guidance but not always affection, relationships that have shifted (or plateaued), and careers that no longer light the same fire. Hormonal changes add another layer, often quietly disrupting sleep, energy, and mood.

In this phase, many women tell me they feel like they’re moving through life with a low battery. Not drained enough to stop completely—but never quite recharged either.

What’s striking is how often self-care comes up as the answer… but not the solution. That’s because self-care has been diluted into a list of consumer-friendly gestures: take a bath, light a candle, treat yourself. And while those things can be lovely, they rarely reach the depth of what’s really needed.

What is needed—what these conversations have been reminding me—is meaningful care. The kind of self-tending that is rooted in honesty, boundaries, and self-compassion. Sometimes that looks like finally saying no. Sometimes it means asking for help or allowing yourself to disappoint someone in order to stay true to yourself. Sometimes it means grieving what you’ve lost, even if it’s not tangible.

Taking care of yourself meaningfully in midlife might mean pausing long enough to ask, “What do I need that I’ve been ignoring?” and having the courage to listen to the answer, even if it’s inconvenient.

So if you’re in that “meh” space—just getting by, quietly wondering if this is how it’s going to be from now on—I want you to know: you’re not alone, and you’re not broken. Your overwhelm makes sense. And while this season is real, it’s also not the final word.

You deserve to feel alive, not just functional. And you don’t have to do it all on your own.